Several years ago I heard this little audio clip where a local traffic reporter ends her morning traffic report in an unusual way. I ran into it again this morning and it is still funny (I honestly can't stop giggling). Listen by clicking here. If you can't get the audio to work, a transcript follows:
"Thanks Bill...and several issues to pass along...the major roadways beginning to clear out nicely...southbound I-15 looking better from 33rd South all the way out to the 44th South. Heading into Davis County you'll still run into some slowing in the Bountiful area, for the most part people are moving pretty well...and, we're grateful for this wonderful day and we humbly say these things in the name of Thy Son, Jesus Christ, amen."
The woman is obviously very tired and somewhere in the middle of her report slips into that dream-like prayer state that we're all familiar with. You know, the one where it's all vain repetition. But, here are three things that I love about this:
First, that she uses we. She is praying in behalf of all of FM100's listeners. Isn't that comforting? I think all of our traffic reporters should be required to pray for the driving public.
Second, She is grateful for this wonderful day. The day is obviously just started and already it's wonderful, and for that she is truly grateful.
And third, she says these things humbly. I am guessing that if she didn't mean it then, she did within a couple of seconds. When she realized what she had just done. Nothing like doing something hilarious to really help remind you that it's not all about you.
Added bonus NOTE: I just noticed another thing about this. The reporter says that "southbound I-15 [is] looking better from 33rd South all the way out to the 44th South," which sounds good, but if you're familiar with that section of the freeway, you know that she's talking about maybe a quarter of a mile of road here. She's obviously already fallen asleep by this point and is just phoning in the report from that sleepy, happy place.
I love it.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Ten Years? Feels More Like a Decade.
Buffy and I have been husband and wife for ten years now. That's a decent amount of time to be tied to someone that you weren't originally related to. A few things have changed since June 19, 2001 (our wedding day). A sampling follows:
(1) Buffy's hair is not as curly as it used to be,
(2) there are four children with genetic ties to us,
(3) I have a number of gray hairs on my head, and
(4) there are about twenty pounds of me and an inch or two of forehead that Buffy is not officially married to.
I asked Buffy to marry me on the 28th of February in 2001. We had gone to dinner that night and back to BYU Campus to walk around. We wandered into the Madsen Recital Hall, the space where we rehearsed with our choir, BYU Singers. It's more-or-less where we had met.
There, a friend of mine had pulled out one of the nine-foot grand pianos and placed it in the center of the Madsen stage. She had also, at my request, set up a number of small tables and stools with various items on them. Each of the items held some symbolic meaning. I brought Buffy on to the stage and sat at the piano. I played the song that I had written for her (you can listen to the song by clicking on "She Has A Smile" on the little widgit thingy on the upper right-hand side of this page). After the song, I got down on one knee, presented a ring, and asked her if she'd marry me. She said that she'd be honored. Then we looked at each of the items placed around the stage and talked about what they meant.
Bread. On one of the tables was two loaves of bread, unsliced. This symbolized my promise to provide for her.
A couple of bricks represented our home, together.
A Hoppy Taw, which is a marker one uses to play hopscotch (we had played hopscotch a number of times on dates), symbolized the fun we would have together.
A copy of The Book of Mormon symbolized our commitment to God and our religion.
A children's book, I don't remember the title, symbolized the children we hoped to bring into the world together.
I think there were a couple of other things, like candles and flowers (maybe candy, a live chicken, a loaded gun, a fruit roll up, shoe laces, and mismatched socks--I'm just kidding, I can't help myself. I just love random lists.).
I probably should report on how we're doing on the symbolic things that I promised to provide:
Bread. Check. We're not rich, but we have enough and are comfortable.
Bricks. Check. After moving six times in six years (ouch) often just after the birth of a baby, we have been in our current home for four years, we like it. Although we do plan to make one more move before staying put forever.
Hoppy Taw. Check. We have fun. We also get bored and grumpy and sad and lonely and happy and giddy and stupid and smart and everything else that all committed and happy families do.
Book of Mormon. Check. We are active in our ward and love God and the gospel very much.
Children's book. Check. There are four little people running around that look and act a lot like Buffy and me.
I can honestly say that Buffy's answer of "yes" to my proposal has had a profound effect on my life. In fact, I can't imagine my life without her. I think I'll go ahead and re-up for the next ten years.
(1) Buffy's hair is not as curly as it used to be,
(2) there are four children with genetic ties to us,
(3) I have a number of gray hairs on my head, and
(4) there are about twenty pounds of me and an inch or two of forehead that Buffy is not officially married to.
I asked Buffy to marry me on the 28th of February in 2001. We had gone to dinner that night and back to BYU Campus to walk around. We wandered into the Madsen Recital Hall, the space where we rehearsed with our choir, BYU Singers. It's more-or-less where we had met.
There, a friend of mine had pulled out one of the nine-foot grand pianos and placed it in the center of the Madsen stage. She had also, at my request, set up a number of small tables and stools with various items on them. Each of the items held some symbolic meaning. I brought Buffy on to the stage and sat at the piano. I played the song that I had written for her (you can listen to the song by clicking on "She Has A Smile" on the little widgit thingy on the upper right-hand side of this page). After the song, I got down on one knee, presented a ring, and asked her if she'd marry me. She said that she'd be honored. Then we looked at each of the items placed around the stage and talked about what they meant.
Bread. On one of the tables was two loaves of bread, unsliced. This symbolized my promise to provide for her.
A couple of bricks represented our home, together.
A Hoppy Taw, which is a marker one uses to play hopscotch (we had played hopscotch a number of times on dates), symbolized the fun we would have together.
A copy of The Book of Mormon symbolized our commitment to God and our religion.
A children's book, I don't remember the title, symbolized the children we hoped to bring into the world together.
I think there were a couple of other things, like candles and flowers (maybe candy, a live chicken, a loaded gun, a fruit roll up, shoe laces, and mismatched socks--I'm just kidding, I can't help myself. I just love random lists.).
I probably should report on how we're doing on the symbolic things that I promised to provide:
Bread. Check. We're not rich, but we have enough and are comfortable.
Bricks. Check. After moving six times in six years (ouch) often just after the birth of a baby, we have been in our current home for four years, we like it. Although we do plan to make one more move before staying put forever.
Hoppy Taw. Check. We have fun. We also get bored and grumpy and sad and lonely and happy and giddy and stupid and smart and everything else that all committed and happy families do.
Book of Mormon. Check. We are active in our ward and love God and the gospel very much.
Children's book. Check. There are four little people running around that look and act a lot like Buffy and me.
I can honestly say that Buffy's answer of "yes" to my proposal has had a profound effect on my life. In fact, I can't imagine my life without her. I think I'll go ahead and re-up for the next ten years.
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